Youngest of 3 and Taking Care of Elderly Mother with Dementia

I am feeling very frustrated because I am the youngest of 3 children and I have a bad back and I am caring for my mother 24/7.


My 2 older sisters both live within 15 minutes of me and I have to virtually beg my oldest sister to come over and help me with our mother. My middle sister is virtually non existent for visiting let alone a helping hand.

My sisters both work a part time job for the village that they live in. My oldest sister cleans for the elderly 3 days a week and both sisters have a part time job for 2 hours a day, 1 hour in the morning and 1 hour in the afternoon. There is really no reason they can't come over and help me out with our mother.

I have severe sleep Apnea so I don't sleep well and my oldest sister came over to give our mother a shower and my sister got angry with me because I needed to take a nap while she was here and basically told me I couldn't nap while she was here with our mom.

When my oldest sister gets done with her 1 hour in the afternoon job she goes home and calls it a night but I just don't understand why I don't get anytime for myself at all. I don't have a life at all.

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Fight Back
by: Anonymous

You can put your foot down if you are bad off enough. Refuse to accept the burden of almost total responsibility by insisting that your siblings care equally for your parent.

If they don't want to, then either suffer your situation or find a way to get Mom out of your life and into a facility that can deal with her properly.

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Get help negotiating
by: Anonymous

How about if you find a mediator that can help you negotiate the caregiving deal between you and your sisters?

Get it all set out in writing.

Good luck.

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