Why am I the Chosen One?

by Leona
(Reno, NV)

I LOVE my folks to death. But I am getting resentful. I am a nurse. Ten years ago we put an addition onto our house for my folks. Two of my siblings live out of town and when they come to visit want to stay at our house. I have enough on my plate.

One brother (the oldest) lives 7 miles away but "it is hard to see them getting older". We see and deal with it everyday. Dad only wants ME. Dad is getting MEAN and takes his frustrations out on me and mom. Dad is currently in Rehab with a host of health issues.

I am the Nurse so I am CONSTANTLY called to figure out what is going on with him and the staff at the rehab center or hospital. I feel like I have no life and frankly have had suicidal thoughts more frequently. I suffer from a chronic illness and have SEVERE sleep and fatigue issues and have had chronic depression for years.

But what would happen to all of our animals and my parents if I killed myself. I feel as though some days I cannot do it another day or minute.
I LOVE AND WORRY about my folks to the point that it is all consuming. I feel trapped, obligated, lost and TIRED.