"Town Without Pity"

by Lucille
(PA)

Beginning in the 80s, I noticed that various friends, acquaintances and mostly family members were lecturing me about my lack of concern for my mother.


I couldn't understand this because I was there for her weekly, and my children (then still at home) would also visit and help out. She had a big family who would visit frequently.....I'm an only child. But, I couldn't go to Wal-Mart without getting "hit" with a reprimand. I even sought out my priest's help as to what was happening.

Her doctor, a first cousin, wouldn't answer my calls or written correspondence yet I had power of attorney. Finally, my mother is directed by her doctor to an assisted living facility due to moderate dementia. The call came to me from the doctor's sister!

She's now in a very nice assisted living home...I was forced to get guardianship for her because of her sibling's interference and calls to the staff on my mother's behalf. Now, each time my husband and I visit her, I get hammered the whole visit, and then a follow-up call by phone later in the day telling me how bad a person I am.

I do love her, but she's created a bad reputation for me which is not deserved, and visiting her is getting to be a nightmare. I'm doing everything I can for her, and so is my husband. This is causing a change in attitude by my children toward this woman for which I feel bad, but it's understandable.

Any suggestions? Please don't tell me to "just show love"... I've been doing that. Thank you.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Caregiver Stress.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Voices From The Wilderness

    Dec 17, 18 01:06 PM

    So many of us from around the world calling out for help. I am just amazed. All the situations similar or different, all with one thing in common, family

    Read More

  2. Under Surveillance!

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    Having my 85 year old mom living with us is like being under surveillance. She is constantly watching what we are doing, listening to our conversations

    Read More

  3. Too Alone in This for Too Long

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    This morning, having my coffee, out of the blue, I had a panic attack. I felt lightheaded, nauseous, high anxiety. I had to stop everything and go lay

    Read More