Tired, Guilty and Ashamed

My mother and father are currently in their 80’s and their health is declining. I am 45 and I have three other siblings who are nearing 60, so I am the youngest. We all do provide help to my parents so that is thankfully not an issue. My question is this. I have for a few years been going to my parent’s home almost every Saturday to tend to their needs. You name it I do it. I am usually there from the morning until night.


I feel like I work 6 days a week and I’m quite exhausted. Since I’m the youngest I feel like I should be doing this with a smile on my face but it’s starting to get the best of me and I’m starting to have a lot of resentment towards my parents.

My wife thinks I’m pushing it too. They have plenty of money and do get care throughout the day, except for when my other siblings need to take them to doctor’s appointments throughout the week. I’m coming to the point though that I’m about to ask my mother if it’s okay that I tend to their needs every other Saturday instead of every Saturday.

I certainly can’t give every detail of my situation in a post but I feel bad for wanting to do this. Am I being selfish? It may seem like a silly question but just wanted some thoughts.

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don't feel ashamed
by: Greenacres

I think your wife is right. You are going to wear yourself down and maybe it will affect your mental health, too. We all succumb to feelings of resentment, then that makes you feel ashamed. Don't do that to yourself.

Just do what you can and I think it wouldn't be a bad thing to just go to parents every other weekend. Good luck to you and you are a blessing.

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