This assumes you have competent siblings

by Oscar

Some families have siblings that are more trouble if they get involved. My youngest sister is psychotic, and my one well sibling - a sister - and I wound up taking care of her and keeping her out of jail after her last episode, and finally placed her for a year in a halfway house (very hard to get someone into one of these).

She's medicated now, but also diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder, so she's entitled, rude, selfish and snotty now that she's medicated.

My brother hasn't worked since he got out of prison and deported for a foreign country 10 years ago. He is prone to rage, lives 2,000 miles away in the mountains, and when our father died and I told him that I hadn't worked in the last 5 months and instead had helped with my father's healthcare and started working on sorting out 50 years of financial records, simply got on a plane and went home.

I was earning over $100,000 a year before I started I got involved in caring for my sister, father and now a mother with dementia. I've barely worked in 3.5 years, and am hurting financially form this, and going through paperwork is unbelievably unpleasant for me.

The only thing worse would be getting my siblings involved - I've cut them out of my life.

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That's probably the best decision you could make
by: Anonymous

I have siblings that I haven't seen in 20+ years and neither have been involved in my parents' care either. And like you, had they been involved things would have just been more complicated. I am truly thankful mom and dad had a falling-out with them years ago.

I tried, as an adult, to have a relationship with each of them, but found out what a-holes they each are. So I told them each to have a nice life, and I've gone on to NOT REGRET any of it. I don't work either, and haven't for caring for my parents like you. Yes, it's hard.

I miss my professional life too, and financially it's difficult. But we do what we need to and try not to have resentment or regrets. Hang in there and take care of you as best you can in the process.

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