Stressed Out

by Gabriella
(Florida )

My mom has been living with me and my family since she was in her mid 50's and she's now 70 years old. She recently had a coronary bypass and mitral valve replacement, I went through hell emotionally through the entire time, I cried all the time, had anxiety and was so stressed out. I have an older brother that she hasn't seen in years and has never helped me out with her.

He came to see her before surgery and left immediately after surgery after he knew everything went well. He didn't call or text to ask how she's was doing except for 1 time. When she was in the hospital post op she had dementia and it was sad to see.

I never left her side except for when I had to pick up my son from school, and made food for her to eat at the hospital because she didn't want to eat the hospital food.

Now that she is home I noticed she could care less of what I do for her, I have no time between taking care of her, my son, cleaning, cooking and taking her to her doctor's appointments for myself.

She's different now, when I say okay time to take a shower she refuses and I explain that if she doesn't she can develop a infection, or when we brought her home she had dementia for the fist 4 days and I stayed with her in her room to make sure she was okay and she would
randomly sit up and talk to me until I woke up the entire night, so I didn't sleep at all and had to be up the next day to tend to my son and husband.

She also talked in the day time to her self, so I decided to call her PCP and ask if maybe I needed to take her to a therapist and my mom got so upset said I was the one trying to make her crazy and I explained to her that what was happening wasn't normal and I just want to make sure she wasn't severely affected by the general anesthesia but she continued to be upset.

I explained to her that if this continues she wouldn't be able to stay with us because she would need professional help. I tried to understand her but it came to a point that is hard, everything is a battle with her on a daily basis.

She has always treated me differently from my brother, I just don't understand, I have always been there for her through the entire time and my brother never has or cared enough to be involve with her but she always makes sure to mention that he's her favorite.

It's hurtful but I also realized if she feels that way she should move with him, so I told her she needs to contact to let him know how she feels since I'm a bad daughter, I can't live like this anymore it's taking a toll on me emotionally and physically.

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