Stop the Insanity!
Oh my gosh! No way should you feel guilt for taking your parent to a nursing or assisted living facility - they will be safer AND happier and when you and your family visit, everyone will be honestly happy to see each other and the time spent will all be positive.
These facilities have professionals that know how to respectfully deal with the elderly and your parent will be so much happier among peers and people in the same boat.
Assisted living will give them their own apartment, along with doing their laundry, cleaning, changing diapers, bathing, medications, meals, entertainment, outings, doctor visits, etc. they need nothing else, except family visiting them.
My mother-in-law, after 5 horrific years with us, finally went to assisted living (kicking and screaming for sure) but she is happier now than I've ever seen her.
Yes, it's expensive, $3000/month, but her social security covers some of it and if necessary we will sell her house to assure she continues living in this wonderful environment.
If you have siblings, TELL them your plans and their portion of it. FIND A WAY to do this!
Talk to the facility people, they are expert and can advise you on how to tell your parent and how to ask family for financial assistance. Just find a way to get it done. Get this ball rolling now so your parent will have time to adjust and understand how much better their life is there.
Trust me, it will allow you to love them more.
My only regret is that we didn't do this sooner, by the time we took her there we were ALL resentful and didn't like each other very much.
It's been 6 years now, she is 90, wheelchair bound and meaner than a junkyard dog...but she is safe and happy and goes on outings every week.
She takes an interest in looking nice (gets hair and nails done), which is a major improvement.
If your siblings refuse or cannot help you financially, at least get them to commit to sending a card, letter, gift or visit every couple of weeks.
I recommend seeing an elder care lawyer to get their will made, give you full power of attorney and also have their house put in your name (as well as theirs). Depending on their income, you can count them as dependents on your taxes too. So...go, find a lawyer NOW. It won't be as expensive as you think.