Siblings Live Far Away and I am the Only One

by Emily
(East Coast)

Out of 6 siblings I am the only one who lives in the same town as my elderly father. The rest live between 1500 to 2000 miles away, so no weekend help from them is possible. He has Asperger's and for his entire 50 years of married life his needs were met by my Mom.

She passed away 4 years ago, and his mind-numbing thought processes, and neediness have made me nearly stark raving mad. I am single, 50 and no kids. This has been the longest 4 years of my life. He lives by himself, and does many things for himself, for which I'm grateful. I simply did not have that great of relationship with him before my Mom died, and now I HAVE to have a relationship with him.

I'm torn between feeling sorry for him because his brain didn't allow him to be "normal" and emotionally develop, and being exhausted and angry by his demands. I understand why my siblings moved so far away, but it doesn't make it any easier.