Sibling Decides to Move 1,000 Miles Away to Leave me with the Entire Caregiver Burden

by Marsha
(Los Angeles, California)

I've been my mother's caregiver for the last 2-1/2 years. I have an older brother who is retired and lives close by.


Mom turns 90 today, her health is failing, and all he has on his mind is moving out of state at the end of the year into his "dream town".

I just lost my husband, I'm unemployed, financially strapped, worried about mom's expenses and future care, yet he is so eager to move, which leave's me without anyone to help with mom when I get into a desperate situation.

I feel so lost, afraid and anxiety stricken, wondering how I am going to continue handling all of this. My brother claims he loves mom so much, but he seems disconnected in my opinion. His mindset is so strange.

How do you decide to move 1,000 miles away at a critical time like this? Mom's not getting any better. To me he is so self-centered.

I would think he'd have the sense to stay nearby until mom's no longer around. I feel so angry (I think it's fear). I am not sure how I'm supposed to feel about him anymore.

Anyway, I just needed to vent as I couldn't sleep again. Does anyone agree that what he is doing is wrong?

Comments for Sibling Decides to Move 1,000 Miles Away to Leave me with the Entire Caregiver Burden

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Hard to Comprehend
by: Anonymous

Hard to Comprehend how selfish one can be. Why can't he wait until after his ailing Mother has passed before moving to his dream town? He should stay and help you and your Mom.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2017 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Bewildered

    Oct 05, 17 02:54 PM

    Selfishness, selfishness when you don't feel yourself anymore when all is expected and no thanks are given when your jaw feels so tired you can't close

    Read More

  2. Why Do We Take it On?

    Oct 03, 17 10:40 AM

    So often I read of children caring for parents with multiple needs at home. They are knocking themselves out between their jobs, and families and caregiving.

    Read More

  3. ONE & DONE

    Oct 03, 17 10:36 AM

    I am curious about recommendations to solve: 1) micromanaging from afar from sibling who believes she's in charge and I'm the in-town family caregiver

    Read More