Sibling Caregiver Anger and Resentment - A Different Take
Enjoyed reading your informative site but you forgot all of the siblings and family members who WANT to help out, who have offered help, but have been purposely shut out.
Resentment can be worked out, but there is nothing we can do when sibling control is the main focus in the family/elderly courts and is a growing concern with mediators, attorneys and families.
As the main caregiver, actions should be made objectively and what is in the best interest of the parent, and make sure actions are not due to past sibling conflicts or rivalry. Care giving should not be used as an excuse to take ill intentioned actions, lie to all family members and cutting off all communication to siblings who want to help. Taking a sibling off of the emergency list at the assisted living facility is not helping "mom" and calling up AFTER she leaves the hospital and insisting that a sibling fly in after for a week is not working and communicating with family members.
Your section on resolving sibling conflicts seems one sided and is not addressing what is going on in the court systems today and the growing need for mediators because of unequal control , lack of communication from the primary caregiver and sibling resentment and past sibling rivalry.
I completely disagree with you - COMMUNICATION with the family is vital, and as the primary caregiver - a responsibility. As power of attorney, you are by law, acting on the wishes of the parent, not on your feelings about a sibling.
EDITORS NOTE: We have always believed that communication with siblings is vital....and for all siblings to work together as a team in the best interest of care for our elderly parents.
We are currently working on a series of articles that have this subject as a focus and will have them published shortly.