Shallow, Hallow, Empty...
We share in the care taking of his mother. She has dementia & Alzheimer's...He's the middle son of four. He was the "chosen one" in his mom's inappropriate & dysfunctional way of thrusting & appointing the adult responsibility of having to take on & fulfill the father's place after his dad divorced mom. He was in the ninth grade. Wrong of her on so many levels.
The youngest did nothing but steal from his own mother during the two years he lived with mom & was supposed to be helping. He helped alright, helped himself to anything of value to include life insurance policies she'd taken out in all four of them & herself.
He cashed them all in forging her name on them all. What he doesn't realize is that was his cut of the inheritance, that will be a hard lesson he will have to absorb when that time comes. She's written him off.
The other sibling is to caught up in his own world & drowning in alcohol & the only time he was around is whenever his wife would kick him out & he needed a place to stay for free. She's written him off.
Oldest lives out of state & is to caught up impressing wife number five. Taking her on vacations to Hawaii, to Vegas, Boston to see her daughter graduate, Dallas to visit more of her family & when he's not busy providing & paying for trips he's busy building her dream home, this is about the fourth house he's built for a woman & when he's not busy doing that, he's out buying her more material things.
Mom called him & simply asked seeing as he hasn't bothered to come see her in the past five years if he could come down to visit with her & if he couldn't swing a week if it could be over a three day weekend... This mind you is the only brother that my other half has any communication with, & that's coming to an abrupt end as I write this, he's the man whose had to step in & we got the past five in a half year's with out any breaks have taken care of mom say in and day out, non stop, 24/7/365....
The older brothers response to mom was no he couldn't come to see her, he has way to much going on... Mom of course in her mind set is beyond hurt & devastated.
This selfish son of a bitch whose never once even acknowledge his brother sacrificing his entire 54 years to this woman, can't even in all his worldly haunts swing in a visit to his own mother & at the same time give us a well deserved break so maybe we can go somewhere overnight.
It's beyond disgraceful yet, he has no problem texting on the rate occasion that he questions anything on her bank statement regarding her expenses.
That's the only time we hear from him.
In the past
five in a half year's mom has done certain things that she's spent money on such as paid the airfare for one of her grandsons & her ex daughter in law, his mom to come down over the holidays for a visit. He's twelve & she hadn't seen him since he left here at two months old. She said, I worked for thirty years @ Blue Cross Blue shield & it's my money.
I should be able to do what I want with it. She's absolutely right. So, his last text was to remind us that in the past five in a half year's mom's account has depleted in the amount of three thousand dollars & if that kind of spending continues then she won't have anything left, (mom's eighty years old) & he's just going to take himself off everything.
That's how much he cares.
Yup... The mighty dollar is what his care or concern & love is contingent upon... Mind you, he doesn't & never has contributed one dime towards anything having to do with mom. Has never offered to have her go visit him for a week, hell his three grown daughters (mom's grand kids) two of whom are married with kids of their own, who regularly visit with their other grand mother & have to fly into the city we live in & then get into a rental car & drive past the fwy exit to get to mom's house both coming & going, not once have they ever bothered to stop in to see mom.
Not once. It's all disgusting & shameful.
Mom has now also written off this son & these grand kids. I'm off to cook dinner.
I cook & prepare all mom's meals three times a day, everyday & handle her showering, house keeping, laundry & whatever else my other half needs help with & maintain a full time job. People often ask me why I perform these services for free...
God put us here to help one another & it's not contingent upon a price & how can someone put a price on love anyway? Yeah we're burnt out, & have earned that mental health break a million times over that we don't get & there are days it can become overwhelming & we've had to excuse ourselves to step outside or scream into an anger pillow but, I'll take all of that any day over being any of the Jack asses I've vented about.
What we're doing is temporary. Sadly, mom's life will eventually end but, those idiots, they have to live with themselves everyday & all I can say is it must suck to be them. When my day comes at least I leave here with a clear conscious knowing I did my part & there's & I'm a true believer in karma.
Much love & many prayers to us all because we're all a special group of people so give yourselves a pat on the back & consider yourselves hugged by me.