Please Tell me What to Do.

My mom was in a nice retirement home and sis and I would take her out twice or 3 times a week, we would go to lunch or go shopping I would always drive because sis and mom got in a car crash and sis is afraid to drive.

Then one day mom called up sis and asked her if she could live with her she was not happy where she was. Sis just recently got divorced and remarried. So sis took her in, but mom had to pay her. All the while they fought and mom said she should have never married she should devote her time to taking care of mom. Mom would fight with her and put her new husband down.

So, I started taking care of mom for a few days then it became more and more sis would complain that is all she does she expects me to pick her up and take her out and take care of mom.

So now sis no longer wants mom and wants to put her back in the retirement home mom now lives with me and I can't take care of her as my husband is going to retire and wants to travel mom thinks I should give up my life for her.

I am growing to resent my own mother my mother is in a wheel chair she needs help with the shower she is blind and depends on me for her entertainment she also likes to find fault with your husband she used to chase away all our boyfriends when we where younger and was too strict I was out of the house at 18 with a baby of my own and me and my husband have been married for 40 years. Also my daughter just had a baby girl I want to spend time with my granddaughter.

My mom is 94 and complains about everything and she tells me we owe her. We had the perfect arrangement but my sister made it awful....I can't get mom to go back to the retirement home.
By the way, it was a nice retirement home they made cookies and popcorn in the lobby they had activities but she always depended on me and sis for her entertainment.... She is stubborn and mean and said I was dumber than my new granddaughter.....I could not understand her saying that, is she losing her mind?

I would take her to get her nails, and hair done I would take her out shopping push the wheel chair pick it up put in the car it is a heavy wheel chair and I am almost 60 years old, my sis is 64. My mom She treats me like a dog.

Why does the health care industry make us live longer there is no quality to life. I hope God takes me soon.

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by: Anonymous

You have been manipulated & controlled by your mother & sibling. You do not owe your mother anything. People should not have children to care for them when they are older.

And what bothers me the most is that you want God to take you. You have allowed your sibling & mother to have full control of your emotions to the full depressed state of suicide.

Its time for you to take control back of your life. It is your life. You make decisions on how to live your life. Your sibling and mother should stop manipulating you. And you have the right and responsibility to live a healthy & happy life.

I agree with You
by: Anonymous

My father is in nursing home but the adult children have to visit every day, some days several times a day to keep him calm enough and behaved enough so they don't throw him out of the nursing home.

I have recently retired and my life sucks. I worked hard for 30 years and I am tired and would like a break or something fun in my life but everything I do revolves around trying to make my father content enough so he doesn't do something crazy to get thrown out of the nursing home.

There is no vacations for me, no days off for me, just chronic sadness and holding my breath for the next crisis to occur. My parents didn't buy extended care insurance either and both expect and want to live into their 90's. I fully expect that at this pace I will die before my mother, my mother BTW has used the nursing home as an unofficial means of divorce from my father.

She's playing cards, going to the community center while the adult children are trying to keep my father from sobbing all day, refusing his medications or not eating. It is chronic and constant and I would never put my family through all of this and I am dumbfounded how both my parents could have planned so poorly and left this in the laps of the adult children who now have no lives. If you find the answer please let me know.

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