Over-Stressed 31 Year Old
My daddy passed away in February of this year (2012) we have always been a close family. I have a sister that is 45, a sister 37 that passed way in 2009, and a brother that is 33. I lost my husband in 2006 when I was 25 years old.
I've always been the one my parents depended on for everything. My sister that passed away was also a big help. My oldest sister has always been selfish and greedy she only comes to see my parents when she wants something.
Anyway, after my daddy passed my mom hasn't stayed by herself as they had been married 46 years 2 days before he died. I know my mom is scared even though she lives in a great neighborhood and we even installed ADT.
So, I've had to stay with her almost every night and my aunt does stay some. I am a full time student and I work with my mom, we own a daycare center. I won't let my mom do anything I act like I'm her slave.
I have always been scared of losing my parents especially since they were older when they had me. So now my mom doesn't help herself she expects me to do everything. I cut all the grass even though I have a brother, brother in-law and 3 older nephews. They have never once asked if I needed help.
My sister is always telling me I do too much for my mom and need to stop it but on the other hand she won't lift a finger. My mom is having a surgery for a broken bone soon and since my sister drives her to her appointment (I had to stay with the daycare kids) my mom acts like she is the best person ever.
Mom always talks about how sad she is they don't come to see her but has never once thanked me for what I've done. I've put my life on hold for her and didn't mind doing so but to be treated like her slave is killing me.
She try's to belittle me in front of people and when she and my sister are together I'm always left out unless she needs me to get her a drink or something. I'm sad and very hurt by my moms actions towards me but when it's just us she tells me she loves me and how grateful she is she has me.
I feel like she might just be using me for what I do for her I have never been treated the same as my other siblings. If I try to tell her how I feel she tells me I'm stupid or crazy. Please help I want this to stop but I love her much and would hate myself for not helping her!! What should I do?