Out of sight out of mind

by Lynn
(South Carolina)

My siblings both live in different states. I am totally responsible for taking care of my moms needs. She lived on her own and then moved in with me and my husband for 6 years until I could not take care of her anymore.

Now she is in a nursing home. Out of the 6 years, she might have visited a sibling 1 time. Neither sibling wanted to take her for a week or so, just to give me and my husband a break...

I work a full 40 hour job and took care of her, even with her being in a home i am still responsible for her needs. I am physically and mentally exhausted..

I am so angry, because they don't care. I want to take care of my Mom, but why do they expect to have a life and I cant. Its like I have lost my own identity..

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so many like you
by: Bittersweet

Hi Lynn, welcome to my world. The world of the only sibling that gives a damn. I have 3 useless brothers and I feel like an only child. I have no advice for you, I'm sorry. This is the way it is, this is the way it's always going to be.

Don't expect any help, support or a break. My mother lived with me for 12 years. I hardly saw my brothers in all that time. Now she is 95 and in a nursing home and I see them even less, if that's even possible.

And yes, I am the one responsible for overseeing her care, I do her laundry, I even take her out on weekends along with visiting during the week. My brothers are like ghosts. I never get a break.

One brother took her for a week some years ago and she came home in tears vowing to never return because he had been so unkind towards her. What an ass. So that ended that. And it galls me that I have to share my inheritance with those 3 boobs who have done nothing for their mother. They don't deserve a penny. But in my mother's words; "they're my children too." I'd like to push them all off a cliff!

Anyway, sorry for the rant. You are not alone on this forum but unfortunately you are alone in caring for your mom. I hate how this falls to one child.....most often the DAUGHTER, hence my name, Bittersweet.
I wish you all the best.

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