Otherwise Healthy 81 Year Old Dad has Given up and Relying on Alcohol.
Mom is six years younger than dad. I am the eldest of three children. Dad is an otherwise healthy man other than two failed knee replacements.
They are painful and he has taken to watching TV and drinking. Dad has had control over everything all his life and mom never had power or choice over very little. I called my youngest sibling, because she is the baby, dad would listen to her more than me. She refused to help.
My mom is now taking the position of "power over" and not helping dad get out and do something he enjoys. He did not get his license back when he turned 80 and I know he is feeling depressed and basically useless.
He sits in front of the TV, drinks beer and straight shots and becomes verbally abusive with Mom. He is now getting his days and nights mixed up after he has a nap, thinks it is morning when it is 7 in the evening.
I know he cannot quit drinking cold turkey. So I suggested that he at least only drink beer. I made an appointment with his GP and had some tests done, everything is fine! Cholesterol, liver, BP...all good!
I know Mom could handle things differently as she gets angry and doesn't want to spend much time with him. She will call me as I live 45 minutes away and tell me that he is waking from a nap and thinking it is morning and attempting to take his morning medications, wanting coffee and breakfast.
So I will call back, speak to dad and let him know that I just got home from work. He will disagree with me but I can always get him to come around. I know he is in pain with his knees but I really get the feeling he is just giving up.
He was always a hard working man and really has no hobbies, working around the house, building things were his hobbies. It is like he cares about nothing anymore.
I know I cannot depend on my siblings! I know if he even just stuck to beer, he is a much different person...liquor brings out the worst in him.
I need to get rid of the hard stuff. Suggestions on what might work at this point would be great. I think his forgetfulness is all due to the booze.
Thank you all in advance!