Only Daughter, Four Brothers

by Lynn

Since childhood, my mother always favored my brothers and spoiled them, but she was strict with me. My brothers grew up to be selfish irresponsible "little boys" in grown men bodies, that my mother continued to bail out.

She would not listen to my father and still gave them money without his knowledge. Three of my brothers got on drugs and two later died. I became the guardian of my older brother and the only one responsible to help my 80 year old mother.

She is very unappreciative and tells me she resents the time I spend taking care of my brother and not her needs. My brothers do not do anything for her. Yet, she talks about her "boys" all the time and at times been verbally abusive of me.

Many times, I have left her alone, only to have her call and leave messages or write letters in an attempt to make me feel guilty about abandoning her. My daughter did not come back home to live after college, instead stayed in another state.

My mother had already told her she was looking forward to her help in assisting me in taking care of her. I am looking to sell my home and move anywhere out of state, but I don't know how I will feel leaving her with no one to care for her.

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My Mother is 88 and has dementia. She is currently in a nursing home only because the State said I could not leave her alone while I worked.

I have an older brother that was my Mother's favorite to this day. She took care of him and his family all his life. I was the black sheep in her eyes..she was very physically,verbally and emotionally abusive to me until I ran away from home at 15.

I went back at 19(pregnant)and I didn't want to, but I couldn't see me living on the streets. The abuse continued while I was with her for about a year after the baby. I left again. I moved to another state. The verbal abuse still continued long distance.

There were times I didn't speak to her or see her for years (3-5) at a time. She was just horrible to me all my life, but my brother was still the favorite through his drug life and outside children, etc. Well NOW that she has become dependent he could care less about her.

I brought her from NC two years ago because he was living with her but she was constantly starving and dehydrated from his lack of care and concern for her well being. Well, long story short...I got stuck with her and I'm going to retire early and take her back to NC and take care of her until he last days.

Do not leave her alone. Believe me your conscience will KILL you..the guilt, etc. You do the best you can for her without stressing yourself out. My Mother still praises my brother and it irks me to no end.

I swore I would NEVER take care of her, but GOD has softened my heart and allowed me to forgive her abuse and do the best I can for her. When she goes home to glory, MY conscience will be clear and free from all guilt.

Pray and ask God for patience and tolerance for her. God bless you my friend and good luck.

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