No one but me

by sm
(South Cali)

Yeah, and what if there is simple no one else to help-no other family, friends, Not all of us have the financial means to hire help..

It sucks.... I love my mom and feel blessed to be able to help her but I also would like my own life too...

I feel for those in the same boat.. I cant even imagine having family and them not helping out...

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Nursing home kill him? No
by: Anonymous

I’ve worked in nursing homes. It is by far better care than you think. He will be around others his age, there are inclusive activities for the residents.

A great place for him to get to know other people and socialize. He can get 24/7 supervision and care. Staff are there for 8 hour shifts, and get to go home and have a life outside of work. When will you ever have a life outside of work and caregiving?

Need a break
by: Anonymous

I'm 61 with two teen aged sons... one with special needs. I'm divorced and just starting teaching full time last year. I also had to take courses to get my license as I only had a provisional license.

My brother (conveniently) bought a house with his girlfriend, in a Mass. My dad just turned 97 and he has a full-time aide, but I have to take care of everything.. fill his pill container every week, food shopping, leaving cash for aide, pay bills etc. I am sooo tired of all of this!

I'd like to start dating. Teaching is so all consuming. And my own health is not great. I had a double mastectomy 4 years ago and it's taken it's toll on me. I have osteoarthritis, high cholesterol, pre diabetes, etc. I need a break.

Dad is sleeping all the time, doesn't try to engage in conversation when I visit with the boys, is negative and critical and has become nasty. He snaps at me and the aide.

Yesterday, he was impossible with her... she asked him to move on the bed because he was too close to the edge and he practically chopped her head off.

When I told him he needs to control himself he started to cry and yell that he's going to kill himself and I should have a box ready! I feel sooo depressed and stressed out... my job is demanding and then I have to contend with him!!

I do so much for him and then get rage... and I have a special needs son. I live in NJ and hour away from dad and can't move to NY because my teaching license won't be recognized there. He can't move in with me because my house has only one bathroom and it's upstairs and it's not elder friendly.

I have to sell it this year as per the divorce agreement. I really don't think I could live with Dad anyway. And, I feel imprisoned because I have to live close to him in order to look after him. We can't put him in a nursing home because it would kill him.

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