My Son's Father-in-law Moving In with Him and his Family
My sons' father-in-law is a stroke victim. This happened within the past few weeks. It was a bad stroke, left side affected, was not able to receive medication due to the fact there is a 3 hour window, feeding tube, can not speak, read or write and is in an adult diaper. My son is an LPN, his wife an RN. Two small children and a house too small for an extra person.
I do not believe that this dear man should live with my son and his family in the condition that he is in. My daughter-in-law who adores her dad is being a wonderful daughter trying to help her dad.
Her mother has a mental illness which keeps her from caring for her husband. Her illness could have been handled so that her life with her family could have been much different. Her husband who also is her guardian does not believe in taking medications and would not give her the medications that could have given her a life with her children. This same man was told for years to use Lipitor because of his hypertension and refused. The stroke he had was due to the arteries in his neck, 1 completely blocked, 1 becoming blocked. That is how his stroke happened.
I believe that it is harder to tell a loved one who is in need of 24 hour care that they must go to assisted living or a nursing home. It is harder than bringing them home. My mother got to that point in her life. I knew because of my own health issues, a full time job, a marriage that had its problems my mother could not live with us. My sister and brother had their reasons.
It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I had to tell her she needed to go to assisted living.
The end result of 5 years of living in assisted living was good for her. She made friends, a boyfriend and when she passed I believe that last few weeks were her happiest. I still did what I could for her while she lived there.