My Mother has Become so Angry

I went to visit my parents who live about 1,800 miles from us. They are 75 and 85.

My younger brother died two years ago of a drug overdose and my sister two months ago from suicide. It has been very tough.

But, my mother physically went after my older brothers wife saying she is afraid that my older brother will commit suicide because she is not caring for him right or getting help (gambling issue) for him.

My mother said that she will be the next to go and that she will not watch another child die. It was crazy and I felt like she took all this anger and pain out on my older brothers wife! It was awful.

Now she has created this huge problem within the family and my brother's marriage. Why is she acting like this?

I don't know what to do for her. I live so far away. I know that at one time she was on medication for hearing things that were not there but has since stopped that medication.

I know she is depressed about money as well. She is just so negative. Always makes comments about why I don't visit more often.

I buy them what they need when I'm there and try to do things with them but most of the time they just want to sit in their apartment and do nothing. Even when I'm there I feel like I have to make them spend time with me outside of their apartment.

I'm so frustrated because I love them but I can't wait to leave because of how they are. What do I do ???

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I am dealing with an 86 year old mother who lives with me and I am caregiver
by: Jan

She seems to hate living with me and has become extremely depressed and resentful toward me. Taking out her unhappiness about her limitations and the way her life is now on me.

I don't seem to do anything right in her eyes. Now she is saying she just wants to die. Sometimes she threatens me with going into a nursing home which i and my family do not want.

Not sure she wants it either but, feel like she just wants to punish me. Need some help

by: Sherry

My father recently passed away and my mom is in bad health but insists on finding her own place...not the best idea. How and where do I look and what do I say that's the right thing?

I'm my mom's caregiver
by: Kelly

Hi everyone my mom smoked all her life she now has severe COPD and on permanent oxygen I do basically everything for her I have a 9 year old daughter as well I'm in my late 20's.

I feel anger and resentment sometimes towards my mom if I want to go out I have to organize someone to watch my mom first,She treats me like a kid wanting to know where I'm going how long I will be etc....

Sometimes I want to pull my hair out.

My older brother does help financially but none knows how this is driving me crazy....

Thanks kj

Don't Feel Guilty
by: Anonymous

Sometimes you just do what you can for them and please don't feel guilty. I see so many posting on here about older people becoming so angry.

I hate to say it the hearing things may be schizophrenia or some other type of mental illness. When they stop taking their medication is not a good idea you may want to speak to a medical professional.

Parents never expect their children to die before they do, which is understandable. She may be thinking that her mental illness could have been to blame and she may feel guilty.

All you can do is be there for them when they need you. It is very hard when they are so negative about everything.

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