My Mom is Putting us Through the Ringer

by Brenda

My mom has always been abusive and she beat us kids and made us her slaves then when we moved out, she has now started abusing my Dad. She is 70 and Dad is 79 she is pulling him down so much.

She sits around and pee's in her depends until they are soaked she won't take a bath. She sits on the end of the couch ordering my Dad to wait on her and she offers no help, she sickens me and I hate this feeling but its hard to deal with someone like that when they have put you through so much.

It's 5 of us kids and we are wanting to put her in a nursing home since she claims to be so feeble, but she seems to do what she wants to when she wants but claims she can't go to kitchen and fix a cup of coffee, I wish I knew what to do and where to start and no matter what she has done I still love her because she gave birth to me.

I feel sorry for my Dad as she cusses him all the time and demands so much from him and he tells us he does it so he don't have to be hollered at.

Does anyone have any advice? It hurts to think of putting her away in a nursing home but we all work full time and dad says he can't deal with her raising hell at him all the time she is so lazy.

She is so negative and always has been. I tried to get her help for depression but she won't take medicine, she told me she enjoys putting us through hell, I don't understand why she wants to do this to us. Most kids would of left and never looked back but we got our heart from our dad and we all try to look at her good sides but man its hard.

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Just do it!
by: Anonymous

You, and your dad have my sympathy, the above advice is good.... take it!

He's Asking for Help.
by: Anonymous

The fact that your dad told you how bad it is, is his way of asking for help. Your mom is not rational and obviously mentally ill enough that she cannot look after herself. Talk to her doctor and tell him/her what is going on.

If you can't get her moved out into care, then move your dad. No one has to take abuse. What is the worse that can happen if you help your dad? Your mom will get angry? Sounds like she's mad every day any way, so what will be different?

There are tons of senior homes with all levels of care and your dad could move in with one of you until he finds a nice senior apartment. Your dad and all of you deserve better. Do it so your dad does not spend the rest of his days being abused and sad.

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