My Lawyer Sister and Brother in Law

( Gold Coast )

My parents are both gone now and of course I miss them but I saw this site thinking of my cousin & decided to post anyway in the hope it might help others.

First of all - know your own worth. Just because for example- my sister said to me the once I dared asked her why she never helped- I AM A LAWYER & I AM MARRIED!

I smile when I think of her screaming those words at me over the phone now:) but at the time it made perfect sense that I should not have asked her for help. Of course it was horrible of me to expect "a lawyer" a busy lawyer and a women with a husband to help.

That is just how mentally down trodden care givers are. She forgot to mention between them they were very wealthy and could easily have helped pay carers to give me a break.

Your not married and not working she would say-- Not working!! wow 24/7 Mum needed care & I was so drained. We never saw her other than birthdays Christmas & often that was just a card.

Mum wasn't easy & my sister would say Shes not going to speak to me like that- Um wonder how she thought i copped. She called me the night after Mum died and abused me for arranging Mum to be laid to rest close by to the house she owned & loved.

Let it be on your conscience she screamed because Moreen (Mums Niece)has apparently rang and said Mum told her 40 years! prior she wanted to be laid to rest in Sydney.

I felt like saying WELL if any of you had bothered to spend time with her you would KNOW she wanted to go to Southport Cemetery. Our Dads is there but they were not together . I am as in life the only one to visit and care for their graves.

My sister says she just can't take it. Never ONCE did she call after our parents passed away on Mothers day of fathers day - or Easter Christmas or their birthdays or the anniversary of their deaths to say lets go to the graves together - not once.

People grieve differently yes - but she knew they wanted her to support her little sister . She walked on my head abusing me much of my life- making me feel so beneath her . Its taken years for me to understand i am not only equal to my big time lawyer sister ( X lawyer) but I am a far better person with a lot less $....

Don't let your siblings walk over you. That's my message. My sister said about a year ago I was dead to her. That was the last disrespectful thing she did to our parents.

She was SO upset that after Mum being gone twelve years I asked her what her intentions were towards the home I have lived in for over twenty years looking after Mum.

She said I will NEVER leave you my half of Mums house - knowing full well Mum had left a later Will & wanting me to live here. She LIED to another lawyer saying she had no idea- but forgot she called that Lawyer 12 years prior and abused him for doing Mums Will.

Just don't let others make you feel your life isn't as important as theirs & your just a nothing like my sister did me for years.

After ten years I found out my sister hadn't even put the property through probate then said I am too busy to talk to you - maybe at the end of the year or in three months time. HOW DARE SHE.

Well Mum would be happy & sad to know I got a lawyer who knew my sister and Mum well and thank god he sorted my sister out quick smart.

I don't have a family & I miss that but I don't miss the way she looked down her nose at me her entire life! As you get older you see things differently. I realize now she was always jealous of my looks. Oh she was a attractive girl but i had the long blond hair blue eyes and olive skin.

Mum told me when I was younger she used to glow if someone said you look like your sister(she didn't but)..... By comparison I am a poor person to their multi millions but I wouldn't swap the times I had with my parents for all the tea in China.(Mum used to say that)

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You Never had a Sister
by: Sandi

You are better off! Period. I have siblings, I am in the same boat except for one thing, I know I am doing right by my Mom. If they help, good. If not, whatever. When Mom dies, I am going to be an only child. I don't even care.

They are there for Mom sometimes, I thank them for that, but while my Mom was transitioning to my care, we had lots of disagreements about what to do etc. She was in and out of different facilities including mental. She has been on psych medications for 50+ years.

Anyway, they told us "they have nothing else" for Mom and she needed shock treatments. Me and my younger brother refused to even discuss it. My other brother(he has big money, too) it must be a money thing, had a lot to say to me over the course...we went back and forth with e mails...I was okay with the criticism...but the last draw was "Cheryl(his girlfriend), has a friend who is a lawyer at Agency for the Aged, and if you don't let Mom's Dr's do whatever they need to do, I will make that call on Monday morning.

Well...that day...my brother was just my Mother's son. It is something I thought would never happen, but it is inevitable. But, I have a caring loving husband, that is really good to my Mom, and when she is in need of further care and I can't handle it anymore, she will go in a home...and for the first time in 60 years I will be an only child.

I will walk proudly, and no regrets and you should too. Your sister sounds like a typical "rich bitch", pardon my french. She is incapable of sharing or carding, so you are so totally better off without her in your life. I hope you have "girlfriends"...they are way better than sisters in a lot of cases!

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That's Sad.
by: Anonymous

It's too bad your sister never learned what really matters in this life and karma has a way of taking care of things. I can read between the lines that you still have a whole lot of hurt.

You probably, despite the past have love for your sister but are still grieving not only the loss of your parents, but the loss of your sister as well. Why don't you sent her a copy of your message here? If you still need closure, what about actually suing her for half the cost of caring for your mom, including missed wages because you couldn't work while caring for your mom?

She's wealthy and she should have helped. It may be too late for that, I don't know, I'm not a lawyer. But, you do need some sort of closure and need to build a new family (get close friends) for yourself. Find the way to shut this door for good.

Often with loved ones I've seen a whole change in life is what brings peace. Consider moving, doing volunteer work and get moving.

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