My Father-in-Law wants Everything to be Free to Him!

by Susie

All of my father-in-law's children but me and my husband live far away and I get stuck dealing with him. He has more than adequate money, but expects me to pay all the gas to chauffeur him to town, meals,do his laundry, clean his house(I even have to use my own cleaning supplies when I clean over there), etc.

He gives money to charity, his church and even his own kids but seems to resent me asking for my expenses back. My husband was sick a few weeks back and I had to hire someone to mow his lawn.

He went through the roof, family helps family. But what about my expenses and time and I am not even his child. I am resentful of his using me, when he gives money to his friends, church and none to those who actually are doing the work.

He even told me the last time that he was in the hospital, that he doesn't need me to feel obligated to take care of him. I lost two days from my work and my husband didn't even stop to see him while he was in the hospital.

Comments for My Father-in-Law wants Everything to be Free to Him!

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Welcome to the World of Elder Care
by: Anonymous

I understand totally what you are saying only it is my Dad and Stepmother. I have 2 sisters and one brother who live in other states and I am the closest to them geographically.

I can honestly say it is very easy to fall into our roles as caregivers and very difficult to get out of it. If my Dad would have told me not to be obligated to take care of him I should have jumped at the chance to say NO!

Since your Father in Law gave you the option I would bow out and have him pay for home health care to do all of these things instead of you.

Good Luck

by: Anonymous

And you are doing all this, why? Have you ever said to him "you give money to friends, to your church but you won't even pay me the money I'm out of my own pocket and I will not continue to pay your way?" As for cleaning, go to his house and say you don't have anything to clean with.

If he insists that you bring yours, just simply say, I cannot afford to supply these for free. Also, tell him that you want to be paid to clean, if he won't, then don't. If you back off, the rest of his family, including your husband will be forced to step up.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.

Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved

Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Under Surveillance!

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    Having my 85 year old mom living with us is like being under surveillance. She is constantly watching what we are doing, listening to our conversations

    Read More

  2. Too Alone in This for Too Long

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    This morning, having my coffee, out of the blue, I had a panic attack. I felt lightheaded, nauseous, high anxiety. I had to stop everything and go lay

    Read More

  3. 8th Christmas with Mom

    Dec 13, 18 03:29 PM

    This year I’m not even putting up a tree. It’s just me and mom and she doesn’t know, nor will remember if told, that Christmas is happening. The day of,

    Read More