Moms jailed and Pops is set free

by Claudia
(Roseburg)

For about six years my Mom has been dealing with Parkinson's and now has dementia. My Dad and her have been married for 46 years. Mom always dropped everything when it came to taking care of her man (Dad) so it really stung when I saw how neglectful my Dad has been throughout this ordeal.


He called all us kids up and said he'd like to discuss something. So we went to IHOP and sat down and he proceeded to tell us that he's putting our Mom in a home and we can come visit her anytime. He then says he's got to go on with his life and out of the clear blue this very petite woman walks up and sits down next to him taking his hand in hers.

He then introduces us to this thing-woman and says he's found love and hopes we will understand!
I almost threw up my pancakes and angry, hot tears started to run down my face. I had no control over my obvious emotions.

Before I could say anything, my brother cuts me off and says that while he won't approve of my Dads new found love, he does approve of putting our Mom into a home. At this point, I'm beside myself. I can hardly speak for the lump stuck in the back of my throat. I told him how could he be so cruel, and then this "woman" (Beverly) says you have no idea how hard this has been on your Dad. I almost threw my coffee at her.

Oh, I might also add that he has already paid someone to pack up everything to take my Mom to this new "home" (rest home) and plans to liquidate the rest of the household items as he can't bear the memories of days gone by. My sister and myself have been there every other day to help out at home with our Mom and we hired a full-time caregiver who is there 6 days out of the week. Apparently that's not good enough for Dad.

He just wants to wash his hands of my Mom and anything that reminds him of her.
Right now I truly hate this person and feel nothing but disgust for him. My Mom was a good wife and a loving mother all these years and this is the thanks she gets?

I have made a bold move and offered to take her in to live with me and my family. I will not let this go. I can't. I get the feeling my Dad has been busy finding "love" for quite a while now.
What to do?

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Gold Digger?
by: Leasa

I can understand how you feel, I would be so angry as well. You don't say how old the new girlfriend is, but I would guess your dad is quite elderly? How is your dad's health and state of mind?

This woman could have weaseled her way into your dad's life and she could be the reason he is 'liquidating everything'. She could be after money. If your dad was not emotionally strong, with the stress of your mom's condition he is ripe for a scam artist. If your dad goes through with this, he could find himself divorced, quickly remarried and in a home himself with the new woman collecting his assets.

It would not be the first time it's happened.

See, with your mom's dementia, the woman he married is gone and he is lonely for companionship and very needy right now.

Do try to figure out if maybe your father is a victim of a very convincing gold digger.

Also, please don't be in a hurry to bring mom home until you find more answers and have dealt with the emotions concerning your dad.

Keep us posted and good luck going forward!

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