My mother got ill six moths ago, upon which time, I drove from Tulsa to Ohio. I found her in her low income apartment, in totally deplorable conditions. If any social service worker had come into her home, she would obviously been taken out.
I have family there, and one sibling who had been running errands, but turned a blind eye to the filthy, urine filled clothing, spoiled food, and lack of any hygienic conditions.
I proceeded to schedule Doctor Appointments, wash bags filled with fecal matter and urine, over 25 loads in the laundry room, scrub walls, empty cabinets, etc., after gall bladder surgery, I brought her to my home to have back surgery.
This process took months, during which, she could not walk on her own, bathe herself, cook, or do any basic tasks.
Three visits to the hospital ER room, many stays in the hospital, and the surgery was performed, with good prognosis, however, she then had an adverse reaction to new medications she was put on, and spent six days in the hospital with delirium, where she thought we were trying to kill her and she needed to "save heaven for everyone in the future".
After this hospitalization, she now is having a bout with diverticulitis. I have spent so much time and effort on and with her. She has not been allowed food or drink for 48 hours, to allow her bowels to rest. She calls me frequently to tell that they're not caring for her.
Tonight was the final straw.
She called, stating that she was not being cared for, and I called the nurse to verify the Doctor's orders. He said nothing by mouth, in case surgery was necessary. The nurse explained that I had told her mom's complaints, and mom called me, angry, stating that she did not want me talking to them because I had stated to the nurse that mom didn't feel she was being cared for.
She will have to return to my home, however, my whole life has been turned into a giant mess by this, and my mother is angry with me.
I want to care for her, even though she was not an attentive mother when I grew up, but I am getting resentful.
What do I do?