Me, my Mother and the Filipino Caregivers

by Anonymous

I relate to all of your stories. I moved in to help my mom, thinking it would be for a very short period-but I haven't been able to find a home due to the COUNTLESS hours and days visiting and taking care of my mom when she was in nursing care and at home, I lost my Mojo for job hunting per se -- confidence really.


Now, I have two jobs that aren't cutting it financially for me but I am desperate to get out from under the CONSTANT insults, condescending tones and words from my mom--WHILE I AM HELPING HER!

And the ATTITUDES from the Filipino caregivers. They take over the house-are very prima donna like with what they will do and won't do and worse they are disrespectful to me. "I am in charge, I don't clean showers!". Well yes, when you are washing out the urinals from my mother in the shower--THAT is your work-station you must keep it sanitary.

IF I wasn't here the three times on my shift-mom would have died--called 911 saved her from what I knew to not be normal and instinct proved right--clots--every time. When they are here they give medicine like O2 or tons of pills of pain relievers etc...but I know my mom and what is right-SO in that respect I am happy to have been here in the most critical times.

I am the only sister doing the care taking every morning and every Sunday all day-the other sisters come and go as they please to drop in and say hi, have a meal...etc.
Insult to injury living under these circumstances--I have raised a beautiful daughter who is well-mannered and smart-in college now and I have been successful and now appear to be the loser daughter living with mom with no job. UGH

I have heard stories that Filipinos (while good at care taking) are very methodical with their actions making the patient fall in love with them--NEED them to the point of running out of money or even getting put on the WILL!!

I witnessed my dad save all of his HARD EARNED salesman money so what to go into their pockets for 20 hours a day of care--?
I have seen with my own eyes their Mercedes Benz' their Armani, Gucci clothing and LV bags--wow just wow.
Any words of encouragement would be welcome!

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