Lost Hope

by Karen
(Texas)

My mother had been in independent living even after having temporal arteritis and suffering from a stroke leaving her eyesight significantly impaired, but she did well for over two years until just recently. She is 91, and got sick with what we thought might be pneumonia. We took her to the hospital, and she was there from December 22 until December 29th.

She went back to her independent living, and did fine for two and a half days until she fell, and she was taken back to the hospital. She had a broken pelvis, and is now in rehab.

She has lost hope, and has a very negative attitude. I do understand because she has lost her dignity having to be changed because she cannot get up and walk. She has the physical strength to work with the physical therapist.

Any ideas on how to turn her attitude around?

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Poor Mom!
by: Anonymous

How awful for your poor mom. 91 years old, had a stroke, in the hospital over Christmas last year, and now in rehab for a year.

My 90 year old Dad had an operation and was in rehab for 3 months and the only thing he wanted was to come home. Thank God he made it out of that place because one year later he died.

He never did make a full recovery after that operation. But at least he was able to die at home.

There can be a feeling of hopelessness in rehab. My Dad had physical therapy but mostly they over medicated him with pain pills and he laid in that bed day after day.

He came home with a colostomy and needed daily care, but it was worth all the trouble to see the smile on his face and hear the delight in his voice, that day they finally released him to come home.

Is is possible to get her somewhere else where she can have the care she needs? Sometimes people are just shuffled through those rehab places, especially the elderly.

Is she able to go outside at all, in a wheelchair or take a walk? My Dad used to delight in just getting his face in the sun and seeing the sky.

Ask her what she wants. She may surprise you. You sound loving and caring and are no doubt doing the best you can for your mom.

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