I'm at the End
by Me
(NY)
My mom came to live with us a few months ago and now I just want her to go away. She tries to exert control over my home.
I have no privacy.
My sister and brother in law (BTW-she has Power of Attorney) were supposed to help but they reneged. It's killing my family.
A month after she got here she bit me - then told everyone I was coming at her...(I was on another phone call) I've asked my sister for help many times but nothing. We're spilling out of my apartment, I've been on a pullout couch for months now - mom has my room.
I have nowhere to go to collect my thoughts, no privacy. She makes my family and I look like fools - we tell people she's not doing great, no appetite, fast fading memory etc., but when we go out to dinner - she becomes clear and fine with conversation.
When she's home she's afraid all the time, can't do basic things, opens doors, walks in on people etc., tries to order booze at least twice a week.
We have done everything in our power to not let that happen. Last week she fell - now what? She doesn't want to do anything except go out for dinner and drinks, otherwise she does nothing.
I try to have her watch a movie with me in the living room but inevitably she gets bored and goes back to her bedroom. I've encouraged her to call a senior center in town, to call some relatives her age - nothing.
I get her coffee and pastries each day - she only wants sweets now. She can't smell anything anymore and everything has to be removed from the fridge - in case it's gone bad and she can't smell it - we had a few close calls with that so the fridge is emptied every other day.
She's giving her bank account numbers out wantonly- trying to set up auto payments. I need this to end but I'm consumed with guilt. She was an okay mom with me but I was treated like the afterthought I obviously was.
This is infecting my family now- I resent my mother unbelievably and I'm at the end of my rope...