I Think She Just Likes to Complain

My mom lives with us and each day she sits in the corner chair in our family room and sulks. It's right next to the TV so she can't watch it unless she leans over.


Ironically, if I should leave the house for a little while she moves herself to the couch and watches TV. It is only when I am there to see her,that she sits in that chair.

I have offered to take her to the library to get her a card so she can check out books, but she refuses. This is a woman who always loved to read.
I have offered to take her to the Senior Center where she can enroll in a class or two, but again, she refuses. I have offered to buy her crossword puzzle/ word search books (she loves those) but yes, you guessed it, she refuses.

All she seems to want to do is to sit in that chair with her hands folded on her lap and sulk.

Now I spend plenty of time with her, in fact I spend more time with her than I do my own husband, but it doesn't seem to be enough.

Instead of feeling sorry for her, I feel extremely irritated with her and completely frustrated.

To add insult to injury she complains to my siblings (who do nothing to help btw) that all she does is sit all day
Of course she fails to mention the offers I have made to her.

As a result, I have begun to remove myself from her presence as much as I can. I make sure she has what she needs, then I go in the other room, or upstairs and I busy myself.

If she wants to sit all day, then so be it. I will not watch that happen.

Comments for I Think She Just Likes to Complain

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
same here
by: Anonymous

This sounds just like my mom only mine just stays in her room all day. She does play solitaire on her computer or I think she does - she might just stare at the screen all day for all I know.

Like you I've made suggestions, asked nicely if she'd like to move to the living room and watch TV, offered to have cable put in her room. Nope, nope, nope.

I can't decide if she's angry at losing her independence and being in this situation of living with me (and she would never say) or if she thinks she's bothering me by being present. Either way I have learned to no longer worry about her and just go about my business doing what I want or what needs to be done. In my heart I know she's been made to feel welcome so I feel no guilt.

Her actions and your mom's actions make day to day living certainly more uncomfortable than it needs to be. It's so hard to know what's going on in their minds to bring on this behavior or what is short-circuiting and I'm not even sure they could explain it. Life is hard, isn't it?

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Caregiver Stress.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. The Other End of the Spectrum

    Apr 21, 18 10:06 AM

    I have the opposite situation as many others and I really feel for your suffering. Emotions run high when it comes to who should do what in eldercare.

    Read More

  2. Joe and Joyce

    Apr 21, 18 09:53 AM

    My father is a very selfish and ungrateful and demanding man. I retired in 2012 and my wife and I were going to travel for six months, unfortunately my

    Read More

  3. What will be left of us?

    Apr 20, 18 09:23 AM

    I am taking care of my soon to be 85 year old mother who is doing just fine. I on the other hand am not. (I will be 58 next week). I have multiple health

    Read More