I Seriously Don't Want To Do This any Longer.
by Anonymous
My mom who is 90 lives with me and my husband. She needs help with medications, meals, water, dressing, bathing, cleaning, brushing her dentures, ETC....
She has fallen many times and broke her left hip then her right hip. She goes through rehabilitation each fracture and each time gets a little worse. She is constantly saying "I love You, God Bless You" blah blah blah...those little sentiments only add insult to injury.
I hate the fact that I have to be home all the time to make sure she doesn't fall again... I hate the fact that she is here just sitting and waiting on me every morning for coffee and breakfast, then help with the bedside commode which stinks to high heaven when there is a surprise waiting. Then lunch then dinner.
She watch's TV and reads and wants me to write to her siblings or call them because she can't write a letter or make a phone call. She wants me to sit and talk with her only she can't hear me answer her questions. She has hearing aids but refuses to wear them.
She doesn't like her fiber but when she doesn't take it I catch her digging her carp out and gets it everywhere. I used to work nights for about 20 year so I enjoy staying up late and she is an early riser.
So if I'm not up to guide her and help her use the paper to wipe or bring her coffee then I will usually find her making a big mess. We are so different if she says yes I say no, so we don't like any of the same things. If I'm late for a meal she comes out of her room to find out why. I do not want to do this any longer.
I have raised 4 children who are all self sufficient with kids of their own who ask me and my husband to go watch the kids games or school plays and I can not go because I know my mom will be making a mess or fall. She makes 400 dollars too much to go into a nursing home so that option is out and I have 4 brothers who are worthless.
I just pray she will die then I feel guilty all the time because she tries to be so sweet and it really doesn't help. I want my life back to just get into my car and visit my kids or shop but I can't.
My husband does all the shopping now and he tries to help with her but she manipulates him into giving in on things like extra cups of coffee, a little thing except if she get one more cup she will see right through the diaper and then that just makes more work. So if anyone is considering taking their mother or father to live with them really think it through...I didn't! Good luck