I Love my Elder Parents but the Stress of Caregiving is Really Taking it's Toll
My parents have always been good hard working people who did the right things, I suppose.
We are now at the point where we all (my sister and I) just found out how destitute they are and really have few options, if any, really.
They do own outright their home which that is a good thing and since we began caring for them several months ago, we have been beating back the creditors that we did not know existed until we started answering their phone as we are now there most of time...I am working part time and my husband is gone most of the week in the oil fields 125 miles from here.
The creditors are nasty to say the least and looks like we have a good deal of work to do to
Care for my parents
Pay off their bills
Begin planning for the future...
as this is a very difficult situation to be in...I have read a number of stories on this site and it seems to me that we all have essentially the same issue or issues...what to do with Mom and Dad and how do we care for them without help or guidance. Kind of like "I know you don't about any of this, but do the best you can, with know knowledge or experienced help from anyone".
This seems like a one time experience in which I have ZERO knowledge of, that is doubly troubling since I really was not prepared nor do I want to do this caring and waiting on them hand and foot thing and field calls from creditors.
My sister and her husband know that I am alone most weeks as my husband is out of town and as they are close by I would think that they would want to "pitch in" from time to time but so far nothing, and as a matter of fact it seems they have chosen me as the primary and secondary and IF ASKED...should I say BEGGED to help out they will but almost to the point of doing me a FAVOR....did not see this coming as if I knew then what I know now I would have had a better position to bargain with her.
Has anyone else had this issue with the sister (or other sibling like a brother) being conveniently busy or out of touch? My husband says to just stop going over there to help them but that is not the answer as Mom is now walker bound and Dad is slow and clueless about food/kitchen/cleaning etc.
If anyone has any ideas I would be glad for some help..thanks!