I Live with my Mom of 93

by Kathy S
(Trenton, Mich)

I decided to care for mom so she would not have to go to an assisted living. I continue to work and care for the yard and maintenance and cook dinner, wash, get groceries etc... Mom can still get around. She had a small stroke and is learning to walk again with her walker. She now can get her breakfast and do simple things around the house. I'm 64 and am burning out with work and all. I gave my 3 sisters a proposal on me staying at the house after mom passes and getting a reverse mortgage to help pay them off.

They would be sacrificing $20k if we did it that way. Mom will have control of house till the day she passes and it could be used for medical reasons in the future.

Mom could live till she is 100 and i won't be working at that point because of my own age. The siblings are not okay with a reverse mortgage and i cannot afford to buy them out. The house's value is only $130k. I am so hurt by what they are saying about me.

They say I am selfish and I have had an ulterior motive since day one. This is not true. Yes, I thought about it as I was packing after selling my townhouse that I need to think about my future as well.

I don't want to take anything away from my sisters but two of them live out of state and one works all day and can help once in a while. So I feel I have the brunt of it all in caring for mom.

My one sister says mom doesn't need anyone but my mom says she does. They have convinced my mom that a reverse mortgage is not good and leave it at that. So now what? Why am I here? I love my mom but I'm angry that she doesn't back me up on this. Am I wrong?

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.

Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved

Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Mom and Dad 90 and 89 need me to help - D64

    Nov 13, 18 02:05 PM

    Dad is in denial of Moms Dementia , he doesn't know about her dementia because she is with him a lot and he is too kind to be abused at this age , also

    Read More

  2. Hurt Feelings

    Nov 13, 18 02:04 PM

    My story is about my partners mum. She lives near Newcastle and is 86 with dementia. His younger brother lives near to her whereas we live 180 miles away.

    Read More

  3. Shallow, Hallow, Empty...

    Oct 31, 18 10:37 AM

    We share in the care taking of his mother. She has dementia & Alzheimer's...He's the middle son of four. He was the chosen one in his mom's inappropriate

    Read More