I finally understand...

For literally years and years and years I could never figure out what I was doing wrong for my mom. and I now understand.


My mother is a full-blown Narcissist and I will NEVER do anything right.
Period. Plain and Simple. Won't keep me from trying though.

I'm just getting to the point that there aren't any more tears.

Anyone else feel that way??????

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Boundaries
by: Gina

If you don't put up boundaries so that the narcissists stop driving you insane, then you must enjoy how they treat you? You are not powerless. You are not obligated to live with them, even elderly ones.

You are not responsible for their happiness. Find alternative housing arrangements so that you can thrive on your own. Change can be scary, but so is the thought of living your one life in self-made misery.

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Greenacres - there's no way to "get through"
by: Anonymous

One of the things that's been most hard for me is coming to the understanding that you cannot ever change a narcissist. EVER. PERIOD.

You will never be able, no matter how hard you try, beg, plead, cry, reason with, or even try yelling at a narcissist you'll NEVER get them to change their mind.

Because in their mind and in their world they are right about EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME. So unless you're willing to just go with the flow so to speak or go no-contact you're only going to continue to frustrate yourself. Read Dr. Karyl McBride's writings on narcissism. It's very eye-opening.

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same here
by: Greenacres

How do you get through to a full blown narcissistic person? They will ALWAYS think they are better. Do you just cut them out of your life, because clearly your life isn't as important as theirs! I just want to friends with my sister again. Any advice out there?

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Yes You ARE a G O D!
by: Anonymous

I am too - A Good Old Daughter. And we are none the worse for the wear. We are the Timex Watches of daughterdom - we take a licking and keep on ticking. Hang in there dear. We will survive somehow.

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Hang in there Losing It
by: Anonymous

Your daughter needs you. I'm slowly learning not to argue with mom. It's hard hard hard hard hard. She will be gone some day. I pray before me so I can have time with my sweet husband and my dear grown sons before it's too late. Hugs for you and yours. Enjoy them as best you can.

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Losing it
by: Anonymous

My mother is 89 yrs old and lost my 62 yr old brother on her birthday. Going on one year. We are still despondent over the loss of this incredible man. I understand her grief. Her hatred. Anger and the repeated war stories are taking a toll on me .

I moved to Florida and wanted her to have a place to stay in the winter. She hates fl . My daughter as she is injured and no longer a professional athlete. And hopes here other grandchildren don’t turn out like her.

I’ve lived with my mother most of my life and had a great relationship. I have paid almost all the bills. I am losing my mind. If I died today I would be so happy. My daughter is the one keeping me going. I see a therapist once a week and psychiatrist for PTSD. I have afib and the PTSD is from an assault 6 years ago. So when I’m away from her I’m better. My daughter is so hurt .

My mom blew up that bridge and my sister-in-law’ has triplets n works. My mother refuses to wear a hearing aid. Spent thousands on them n lost them in 2 weeks. So sorry for the long harangue but I am at my wits end she’s nice to a stranger big you didn’t see her rage you wouldn’t believe it

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I do!
by: Bittersweet

I've felt that way for over 60 years. Nothing I ever did for my mother was right or good enough. No matter what I did, I should have done the opposite, and not matter how much I did, I could have done more. Never happy.

But guess who has been by her side and who still cares for her even now that she's in a nursing home. If you say it's me, you would be right. My initials are G.O.D......Good Ol Daughter.

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