I Don't Want any Advice from My Brother.....

by Ann
(Florida)

I have been the primary caregiver for my 89 year old mother (who lives with me)for over 10 years with absolutely no help from my older brother, his wife, or son and his family. Yet this brother claims my mother on his income tax as a dependent. Can you believe this? And my mother backs him up. Well I told them both yesterday it's going to end.


If she doesn't like it she can move in with him and I told him, didn't ask, I told him next year I was claiming her b/c I did all the work. He had the gall to tell me he gives her the money he gets back and that I can claim her but to give her the money. He's lying.

They split the money which she told me many years ago. My mother is turning into a major complainer which could be elderly dementia.

She bulks at almost everything I suggest for her to socialize her. Like I suggested we visit a new church. She didn't like the denomination. She went along for the ride and said "I'm not going in." I told her "sit in the car then." I don't want any advice from any brother who has done what he did for years b/c I'm certainly NOT going to get any advice that's going to be helpful to me.

Helpful to my mother and to him maybe but definitely not me. It's so bad now that I have no love left for my mother.

Old wounds have come back up and I see her with new eyes. The best I can do is reach out to other people who can remain objective and fair to support me in a situation that no doubt is about to get worse as her health deteriorates.

Comments for I Don't Want any Advice from My Brother.....

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
My entire family is selfish as hell!
by: Anonymous

I here you! My mother is 96 (stroke,heart disease,wheelchair,deaf,blind). I got laid off after 20 years--the company I'd worked for cheated me (and all others laid off as well) out of retirement and severance.

I am now mom's primary caregiver,and have not had a single HOUR away from her in years.My siblings are all retired and wealthy (I mean millionaires!), and give me no help at all.

I don't even own a car! They never even call mom once in a while on the phone to say hi.I'm so psychologically exhausted that I can barely even think anymore.I never wanted it to come to this,but I have started to hate them all for what they have failed to do for mom, and for what they doing to me!

I never want to see any of them again.

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Let's All Leave on a Trip!
by: Anonymous

We'll rent one of those big cruise ships and head to the Bahamas. We'll see what's going on when we get back 😃

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Get out now
by: Anonymous

I suggest that you let her go live with your brother!!

Just leave on a trip and tell him to pick her up.

You sound like you have done more than your share. Let him take over now.


Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2017 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Barmy and Put Upon

    Sep 18, 17 12:16 PM

    My partners mother is staying with us after the elder alcoholic brother who lived in her house with her was found dead in the bathroom after 3 days! The

    Read More

  2. Exhausted - Mom Thinks I Need to be at Her Assisted Living Home All Day!

    Sep 18, 17 12:14 PM

    My Mom recently fell and fractured her neck (C1). Even though her neck is healing, she has developed some dementia and can't seem to learn any new daily

    Read More

  3. Certified Health Care Aide

    Sep 13, 17 05:50 PM

    I care for an elderly lady in my home. I have been doing this for the last 20 years. I am looking forward to another lady in October. This is a privately

    Read More