Help, my Brother wants Full Financial Control for my Elderly Parents....

by Jenny
(England)

My dad has Alzheimer's and 12 months ago Mum had a massive stroke. This has left her unable to move, eat or communicate but she has full mental capacity.


I gave up a good career to be the carer for mum and dad. I now live with them as mum needs care 24/7. My brother lives a few hundred miles away but unless I do what he tells me, he gets very nasty. He has completely segregated himself from the rest of the family because of his bullying tactics and his complete focus on my parents financial situation.

I do not ask questions on my parents care, I do what is in their best interests and keep the professionals involved. My brother even wants to budget on mums personal care (incontinence pads etc). He wants Power of Attorney but my mum wants my sister to have it. He approached social services and told them I was not fit to look after my parents. They have been to the house, this distressed my mum, and have said that the care I provide is excellent. Now my brother is saying that I am to blame for mums low morale.

He will not accept that this rift is causing mum distress and blames me for everything and has said he is going to involve the police. I don't know what to do anymore. It has been a complete change for me as well, instead of going around Europe with my job and having a good social life, with lots of friends, I am at my parents 24/7. I would do this again for them, but all this other aggravation is really getting me down.

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