Granddaughter taking care of Grandmother

by Rachael
(Smithfield VA)

I am a 30 year old woman living with my 93 year old grandmother. I've lived with her for about 5 years now. At first it was okay because she needed help and I needed a place to stay. As time went on I found myself more and more angry. I was angry at my family for not coming by more, especially my mom and aunt.

I feel like my family thought I had everything under control. My grandma can be very controlling and likes to bark out orders. She also liked to make me feel guilty for trying to have a social life.

I always feel guilty for feeling angry or resentful or like I was making a big deal out of things everyday I would vow to just move out but I'm still here and still picking up, cleaning up, refilling, and anticipating the next order from her.

Living with and taking care of the elderly is a HARD job and if you aren't getting any help from your family *like me, than I say,screw them and please seek some therapy.I know how isolating and depressing it can be and you are worth it.

Comments for Granddaughter taking care of Grandmother

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

You Are NOT Alone!
by: Anonymous

Let me start by saying I commend you for taking care of your grandmother. It is the rarity in todays world but you are not alone.

My daughter & her husband who are also 30 yrs old and have 3 children moved in with my mom 5 yrs ago after she had surgery, is oxygen dependent and could not live on her own.

It started out as you said she needed help and they needed a place to stay (they lived in a one bedroom apt with 2 babies at the time).

In the beginning things were good. I would go and still go a couple times a week to shower my mom, take to doctors appointments, pick up medications and my daughter would make sure she took her medications, fed her, washed her clothes, cleaned, etc...mind you my mom is not the nicest person either and could be quite demanding also.

I have 3 siblings one sibling lives here; a sister who used to show up and take her out to dinner or to family gatherings, etc so the rest of us could get a little break. But of course time marches on...That sister has stopped showing up, feels my daughter and myself are responsible for her total care.

She cannot even care for my mother for a full day so my daughter and I can even go to the zoo or beach for the day. This behavior has built much resentment at this point and has been manifesting itself into depression & anxiety issues with my daughter, her family and myself.

At this point my daughter is in therapy and we are trying to figure things out. Finding help is not easy. But we keep trying.

I guess I felt the need to reply to your post to let you know you are not alone and doing the right thing is not always easy. Thank you for writing this post because we know we are not alone in our battle either. God Bless you always dear...there is a special place in heaven for those who sacrifice for others. ✌❤🙏

A daughter, mother, grandmother who also
is always trying to do the right thing! ❤

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.

Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2019 | All Rights Reserved

Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Need help with negative complaining mother

    Dec 28, 20 12:23 PM

    My mother is 93, in good health, no major heath issues, totally ambulatory. When my father died 6 years ago we found her a beautiful independent senior

    Read More

  2. Ugh!!

    Dec 28, 20 12:21 PM

    So I lost my mom 18 months ago. After her passing I would come to my parents house to clean and cook a couple of times a week for my dad. He still gets

    Read More

  3. 16yrs of Elderly care with NO HELP

    Dec 28, 20 12:18 PM

    I came back home in 2004 to help my dad as he had cancer, he eventually passed away few years later. Well here I am am in 2020 still at home taking care

    Read More