I have always been there for both parents and I'm the only one living near my parents. I have an older sister who calls constantly to dump all her issues on my parents and she feels like this is how she's helping.
I have to pick up the pieces afterward. My brother has totally avoided any contact but maybe a once a year visit. I don't mind helping them but recently my 83 year old mom's behavior has become aggressive and inappropriate in public.
This is not like her which makes me wonder what is happening. When I asked her why she yelled at me why we were shopping and got very annoyed when another clerk began helping me which ended in her not talking to me for two weeks.
I feel she's aware of the changes but appears to be angry at me. UGGGHHH.....I think this is only the beginning. She did this with my sister after a visit with her and it took years for her to get over it.
My sister only encourages this behavior as she has similar symptoms and they are very much alike.
I'm trying to find a happy medium...and feel that no matter what I do it's never good enough and whatever hoop I jump there's another one she puts out there. Just wish I could be appreciated instead of never getting a thank you.
I always felt that it actually is better that my sister lives miles away but the damage she does by phone is amazing.