Feeling Overwhelmed, taken for Granted,and Walking on Egg Shells.
by Heart Broken Tony
I have been taking care of my mom and dad (step)for about two or three years now. My mom is the easy one to deal with, but my dad is the one I have the most trouble with.
No mater what I do it's not good enough, or he takes everything I do for granted. We have had words twice now. The first time it was over some owners manual. He kept telling me that I had taken them. Which I did not, but he just kept on with it. I finally blew up and left. I gave him and myself time to cool off and then went back after a few hours. When I went back I tried to address the issues, but he wouldn't listen, and I was the one to say I was sorry.
About two and a half weeks ago my mom fell and broke her arm in two places which she had to have surgery to fix it. The day of the surgery, I went over to pick him up to go to the hospital. When I got there he said there was no need to go there now which up set me, because when ever he had to have surgery my mom and I were always there for him and then as if that wasn't enough, my daughter is giving me a hard time......telling me to leave him and get up there but I just couldn't do that.
Now that mom has had the surgery she had to go into an after care facility. I was the one to do everything to get her in, and talked to all the nurses and staff as they told me what mom had to do. Well, I told dad to go up to see mom, and she kept
asking when she could go home. I kept telling her what she had to do and started to tell her to move her fingers to get the swelling out of her hand. Dad told me to leave her the hell alone. Well I lost it again, and said fine she can stay here and left. Shortly, dad came to the car and we started arguing. I told him that from now on I would go see mom by myself and would take him up and drop him off and be back to get him. He told me not to bother, and that no one does anything for him and that he doesn't need me..... and that no one treats him as part of the family anyways.
Well I haven't talked to him since then other than last week I called to reminded him that he had a doctor's appointment and to find out if he was taking himself or what, and the daughter that was giving me a hard time, she was trying to get him put in a home, but now I feel like she is using him. because I kept telling her, that I needed a break from taking care of my parents before I blow up.....well, she didn't want to do anything then, but now that I have angered dad, she is over there buttering him up which I feel is just to take from him because in the past we would have a family dinner and he would offer to pay for him and mom, and she was the only one that would take his money which I feel was very wrong, it was a family thing and something that families do. I would give her a hard time about it but she would just blow me off.