I am totally fed up, worn out and sick to death of having to do things I don't want to do, can't do and, at last, have figured out, this morning won't do. No, is not good enough for anyone, and that includes my siblings, and my own children.
You can do this for dad...you can do that for dad. And guess what? I'm on my own, broke, old and unemployed. What a pity party right? Well, I'm over the pity party, I'm at the end of my rope with trying to be diplomatic, loving and kind...and by God not getting anything back in return.
I'm ready to run and run far away from all the advice, criticism and disrespect. Lately, I've been on remote, doing only the vital things to keep my father happy and alive...and who does he want to see and talk to the most..my brother and sister,who advise over the phone from their expensive, retired, lifestyles, and homes.
I've gotten to the point when I answer the phone I ask, "what do you need?", because that's what I've become the ultimate fixer, caretaker, and doormat. Even, if I calmly and truthfully explain the situation, it isn't good enough, they get angry...let me repeat that...THEY GET ANGRY!
I've reached the boiling point by then and, more to the point, totally depressed, unloved, hurt and want to just curl up in my bed and let everything go to hell. Let all of them pick up the pieces, I've had it, in every way. That's my contribution.