Eldest daughter caring for mom and dad

by Susan
(Broomfield, CO)

Six months ago I moved my mom and dad to Colorado to be closer to family. Namely me and my brother. Mom has late stage Parkinson's and dementia and had to be put into a nursing home. Dad had numerous health problems right off the bat. Long story short, I have made all the arrangements as far as finding health benefits for mom to be in a nursing home and managing all her care and then once that was done finding dad a place close by so he can visit mom. I have done all the care taking, cooking meals, driving dad to doctor appointments, etc, etc. I lost my job prior to all this happening but now I cant even consider going back to work. I have too much responsibility with my parents.


My brother and his wife live the same distance that I do and neither one want to hear about all that I do or offer to help. My sister in law does not work and my brother is much to busy with his life and fancy vacations. When ever I bring it up they avoid the subject all together. They only visit mom and dad once in a while but don't do anything to help.

I did not realize how many people that are out there that feel the same way I do. I am just now starting to feel the anger,resentment and guilt. Any suggestions?

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Caregiving the Elderly - Take a Deep Breath
by: Robin

I have read numerous stories here on this site and I am experiencing most if not all of the same issues.

I TRY to think this through and say to myself that this is a temporary set of issues that will go away someday, but it is the constant "interference" with my life that seems to be the most difficult to take.

My "real life" is on hold until something happens to our elderly parents and that is one sad thing to think about. They were so vibrant and happy when we were all younger and now declining to such an extent that even the basics of normal activities are such a struggle for all of us.

From my perspective it is just sad to see the decline and know that there is nothing to cure or "fix", just day to day basics and waiting for the inevitable.

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