Elderly Mother Makes up Physical Problems

by Anonymous

My elderly mother makes up physical problems that can never be proven to get attention. She complained of back problems and inability to eat five months ago and stopped eating or getting out of bed.

She also stopped taking her medications for three days and wound up in the hospital and then rehab. She refused to give me her medications and hid her sleeping pills.

I was afraid she would take too many as she had done before. While in the hospital the work up showed no reason for either condition. Since she is not able to take her medications responsibly I had her placed in assisted living after rehab.

The previous problems have been addressed and she is on multiple medications to treat her back pain. Now she is hyperventilating, on medications for "pneumonia" and refusing to eat.

She has been diagnosed with anxiety episodes and placed on another med to treat this. I can't stand going to visit her since she is very negative and manipulative. I am polite but not able to listen to her complaints.

The best I can do is visit twice a week. She will not do anything for herself and sits in her recliner and is waiting to die.

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more than enough
by: Anonymous

Visiting twice a week is more than enough. Do not feel guilty about this. It is as it is. I have a 96 year old father with dementia who is bed bound, doubly incontinent, sleeps all the time, has partial seizures and angry outbursts which can go on for hours.

I have never had a good relationship with him so the way he is now is intolerable for me. I think you have to protect yourself from them. I have no feelings towards him other than anger and irritation which I do manage to suppress when I'm with him.

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