Disabled Dad & Rude Husband

by Cindy
(Destrehan, LA)

I am 57 years old. My mom died 6 1/2 years ago from cancer. My dad is 83 and is legally blind and very hard of hearing even with a hearing aid.


I have an older brother who lives about 50 miles away but NEVER visits our dad. I do EVERYTHING for dad, always have. My dad lives about 1/2 mile from me in his own house. My dad is very tight with his money and does not like to pay for help with housework and yard work. He agrees to keep the floor clean but then he doesn't. I get tired of doing his housework and mine too. I am retired.

My husband resents my dad. Whenever there is a family function, holiday or birthday party to attend we pick up my dad and bring him along. My husband HATES this. He does not want my dad in his truck. This past weekend when we picked up my dad, my husband refused to let him have his cane in his truck. He put it in the bed of the truck. My dad got upset and so did I. I was afraid it would fly out of the bed of the truck.

My husband (we've been married 38 years) is mad that my dad asked me about this incident the next day. He wants to confront my dad about this and I don't want any confrontation that will just make matters worse.

My husband has changed a lot in the recent years and is very self centered. He never used to be this way. If I try to talk to him about my having to care for my parent, he just turns the table on me and say that I don't want his mom to visit. He has an answer for everything and makes himself the victim and doesn't care about my feelings.

I am at a loss of how to go on short of divorce. My husband is having a lot of mid life issues and won't get help from a doctor. We are steadily growing apart.

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