Deborah McKee

I am the youngest of eight siblings and my disabled mother has lived with me for 13 years. I have 2 children and have been through a very unpleasant divorce within this period. I work at a very demanding job to provide a house with facilities for my mum and my children have suffered. Over the years as I haven't been there for them.


Every time one of my siblings calls my mum they comment on how much time I spend with her or if she has been out but I am working 70 hours a week and I am exhausted and growing really resentful.

They all live a considerable distance away but never take my mum because they don't have the facilities to cater for her needs - I rent a house which has facilities for her but this takes up all of my salary. So despite being 47 and having a good job I have no savings and no provision for retirement.

I am worried that when I am old I will have no one to care for me and no money to pay for care - am I being selfish?

Comments for Deborah McKee

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
No - anyone who gives up their life to care for a parent is NOT SELFISH
by: Karen

Deborah - you stepped up when none of you many siblings did not. I am amazed that you can care for her the kids the house and maintain a full time job. You are not selfish to worry about your future - but I believe what goes around comes around and you will be fine - your siblings will one day need to step up and they will finally understand your burden.

This site has given me more comfort knowing I'm not the only one who feels this way. I don't get it. Why can't any of your siblings at least send you some money to ease your burden. They just don't get it. My sister doesn't either.

I'm all alone in this journey with my dad. No husband no kids no job and no money. I hear you.

Rating
starstarstarstarstar
No - anyone who gives up their life to care for a parent is NOT SELFISH
by: Karen

Deborah - you stepped up when none of your many siblings did not. I am amazed that you can care for her the kids the house and maintain a full time job.

You are not selfish to worry about your future - but I believe what goes around comes around and you will be fine - your siblings will one day need to step up and they will finally understand your burden.

This site has given me more comfort knowing I'm not the only one who feels this way. I don't get it. Why can't any of your siblings at least send you some money to ease your burden. They just don't get it. My sister doesn't either.

I'm all alone in this journey with my dad. No husband no kids no job and no money. I hear you.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2017 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Part Time Caretaker Becoming Full Time Caretaker Next Week

    Nov 14, 17 09:23 AM

    We moved my mom into a nearby senior apartment back in 2012 due to a small stroke. At that time she was still driving and fairly independent. Fast forward

    Read More

  2. Terrible Feeling! Trapped no Win Situation

    Nov 07, 17 09:37 AM

    My mother is 92 years of age and she has always been controlling. Since my fathers death 3 years ago she has constantly complained that I used to come

    Read More

  3. A True Narcissist...

    Nov 01, 17 02:30 PM

    There is no content for a narcissist except the kind that will suck you in. Living with one is a total mind screw where you always end up the bad guy.A

    Read More