Dealing with Those who Don't Care in my Family

There are four adult children. One of my brothers had an argument with my father shortly after mom died over some possessions of dads' that he wanted. He stormed out and said he wanted nothing to do with the family. (2 years ago)

Dad is now not doing well. I have tons of resentment toward this brother for never doing a thing with dad again - we had to lose time at our jobs, give up our weekends and vacations and most of our lives since mom left us, not to mention cover some expenses just so that dad could continue living in his home. My youngest brother and I did mostly everything. Sister was in and out of the picture.

Sister & the "prodigal" brother talk a lot and both despise my father. I know when dad passes, my sister will encourage brother to come to the funeral and to dad's home to clean it out. This brother was left out of the will but sister says it is just a piece of paper and I need to be more understanding of others and the hurt they have gone through.

I dread my father passing and all of the aggravation that awaits me. How do you cope and deal with such people?

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How to Deal with Those who Don't Care
by: Janet

You should follow your father's wishes. I have the same problem and he has cut two of his four children out and is on the verge of cutting out the 3rd because none of them are involved.

I am okay they don't want to help take care of him as I feel this is a personal choice. But they won't call or visit but about once every 6 weeks and to me that is not right. Whoever is executor of his will will have to follow his wishes. That is the law. It is not "just a piece of paper".

It's his last wishes and they should be followed no matter what. Good Luck I feel for you. One more think: Do not ever feel guilty for their decisions. And if you are the only one taking care of him (as I am with my parent) you have nothing to feel guilty about.

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