Confused --Please Explain this Bizarre Behaviour !
by Susan Jones
I am a woman aged 54. There is a widow aged about 68 in my apartment complex. She is obviously lonely and does not keep good relations with her married son nor her married daughter who seldom visit her. She appears to have enough money but no friends (now I know why!)
About 18 months ago, she caught hold of me on the stairs and said she was afraid she would die in her sleep and none would even know. Would I tap her door once on a while and check on her ?
I agreed on humanitarian grounds for a neighbor in need. So, once a week I would ring her doorbell on my way to work and inquire after her health. This continued for a few months.
Sometimes she would ask me to run an errand for her , eg- please buy me some fruit or eggs on your way home, and I would do it quite cheerfully. On occasion she would invite me into her house for a cup of tea and tell me how happy she was that she has someone in her neighborhood to talk to.
Last December I informed her that I have to be operated for cataract and will be out of circulation for some time. I did not specify the time. In December I operated one eye, in January the second. In February/March my aged Father fell down and broke his hip and I was completely busy with his operation and recovery. (He lives in the same building so the lady was aware of all the commotion.)I had not visited her for 4 months.
Last week she lay in wait for me on the stairs. She angrily said " You haven't visited me for 4 months. You don't care for my friendship, you have been ignoring me! " I told her that I was going through a bad patch myself, and did not deliberately ignore her. She angrily retorted " I know all that! You can still find time if you want to!" and she stormed off in a huff!
I was upset so I decided to visit her the next morning and make amends. But when I rang her doorbell, she screamed at me "Go away! I'm busy. Why should I put up with you now, when it suits you?" And she slammed the door in my face.
I am shocked and confused. I have decided not to glance in her direction ever again. Why has she behaved like a jilted lover?? Is it over-possessiveness, jealousy or what?
I was the ONLY person in the apartment complex who bothered with this lady and now she has lost me too ! Can anyone explain this bizarre psychology ?