Completely Confused and Frustrated

by Sweet72
(Gujarat, India)

Fours years back my mother got paralysis attack and she was suffering from Hemiplegia. My life suddenly went upside down now I had to do all household chores as well as earn as my father's income was not that good. Relatives stood apart and day by day it was getting very difficult for me to manage both.

I sometimes suffered from depression as well as used to curse myself I also used to get angry on my mom too much and sometimes even beat her in spite of knowing that that she is helpless and once my anger got subsided then I used to regret and cry a lot on such behaviour of mine.

I didn't understand what to do. I used to ask for forgiveness from my mom and she used to say "Dear you are my lovely child and you have complete right to get angry on me because I am harassing you".

These words of her really brought tears in my eyes and I was like "How can a person be so kind?"

I have fulfilled all her wishes and she was completely happy with my care and used to love all the food that I prepared for her.

She went to God's abode on 13th Jan 2017 but even today in spite of my good behaviour with her I feel like why I ever used to get angry even though knowing that she is not doing anything knowingly but is really helpless and instead of her if I were on bed she would have take equal care of mine.

I forget my good deeds done to her but still remember my worst behaviour for which I still feel guilty.

I just want to know one thing: Why do we get angry on our elders when they are bedridden in spite of knowing that they are the ones who have done a lot of for us and showered their utmost love and affection on us....

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