Choosing Family Over Self

by Monique C.
(London, Ontario, Canada)

I am a 22 year old girl who is trying to care for my 79 year old grandmother and 50 year old mother. This is becoming such a major problem because I can't go to university, so I am studying at home.


The stress of this has caused my already problematic anxiety level to reach new heights, and I had to quit my part time job. In the past 6 months, I have left my apartment complex only twice or three times. I have developed what I think is full blown agoraphobia.

I don't know what I can do because I'm basically holding our little part of the family together by a string. To top it all off, no one has any respect for me because of my age and the fact that it seems I am not going anywhere in life at the moment.

No one seems to be able to see all the work and sacrifices I have been making over the past few years in their interest alone. If I were to simply give up, move out, get another job and start university, it would mean leaving my mother and grandmother to fend for themselves and I would never be able to live with myself. I feel like I'm drowning.

My grandmother has been the only one there for me my whole life, and my mother gave birth to me, so I feel indebted to them for life. I think if I could cope with the anxiety, just that one improvement would make my life much much better.

The constant arguing and fighting is really getting to me, I'm breaking.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Elder Care Anger and Resentment.


Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved


Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Mom and Dad 90 and 89 need me to help - D64

    Nov 13, 18 02:05 PM

    Dad is in denial of Moms Dementia , he doesn't know about her dementia because she is with him a lot and he is too kind to be abused at this age , also

    Read More

  2. Hurt Feelings

    Nov 13, 18 02:04 PM

    My story is about my partners mum. She lives near Newcastle and is 86 with dementia. His younger brother lives near to her whereas we live 180 miles away.

    Read More

  3. Shallow, Hallow, Empty...

    Oct 31, 18 10:37 AM

    We share in the care taking of his mother. She has dementia & Alzheimer's...He's the middle son of four. He was the chosen one in his mom's inappropriate

    Read More