Caregivers are People Too

by fran Lewis
(bronx, new york)

For the last six years I have been taking care of all of the medical, physical and emotional needs of my mom since she was diagnosed with dementia then Alzheimer's.

In the past 6 years I have seen a vibrant woman that was a force to be reckoned with deteriorate.

She is in the last stages of the disease but is hanging on. She is at home with the best possible home care that I could get for her. After spending every penny in my bank account which has gone down to practically nothing, she is receiving full services from Medicaid. But, that is not the only reason for my headaches, stress and more. Being in debt and handling it is one thing, but being tied to living in a building that is not really conducive to someone like myself who likes to socialize, walk and meet people, makes it even harder.

My husband and I have not been on real vacation in six years because no one in my family will take on the responsibilities necessary to care for my mother. Unfortunately, because she is not self-directed the home health aides cannot administer her meds and I have to go down twice daily to crush the medications that are pre-poured in a pill box and make sure that she takes it with yogurt or anything else that I can hide it in.

I have an understanding husband but it is really unfair that no one will step up. I retired early from teaching and all I get from anyone is that they have to work, but taking a vacation is not part of work and once in a while it would be nice if someone took on the responsibilities for a few days to let me relax my mind and recoup. I have written a book about my mother's journey with the disease. It is called Memories are Precious: Alzheimer's Journey: Ruth's Story. It is about her journey from the beginning with this horrific illness and it is a resource for those who want to understand the illness in simple terms and get help. Caregivers are people too and everyone needs to learn to step up to the plate even if it means giving up a few days of their own vacation.

Comments for Caregivers are People Too

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Manipulated and Stressed
by: Anonymous

Let me start off by saying I'm the youngest of 4.

My mother has cancer and is very difficult to care for. She is combative and lives in the past. Everything is everyone else's,fault.

She is mad because the older kids won't let her treat them any type of way so I catch what she really would like to take out on them .

She is also mentally ill. I have no life and my 15 year old daughter is catching hell from her to she lies and forget s everything. But mean lowdown things. And see only claims sick when it is convenient for her!!! Help

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Caregiver Stress.

Home | Site Map | About | Contact | Privacy Policy | Disclosure

© Copyright evSky Incorporated 2008-2018 | All Rights Reserved

Eldercare for

Aging Parents

Are you having a difficult time with being the "Caregiver" for Mom and Dad?

Click Here to Read What Others are Saying and Leave a Comment About Your Own Experiences....

Or Start your Own Discussion Page!

Recent Articles

  1. Under Surveillance!

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    Having my 85 year old mom living with us is like being under surveillance. She is constantly watching what we are doing, listening to our conversations

    Read More

  2. Too Alone in This for Too Long

    Dec 13, 18 03:31 PM

    This morning, having my coffee, out of the blue, I had a panic attack. I felt lightheaded, nauseous, high anxiety. I had to stop everything and go lay

    Read More

  3. 8th Christmas with Mom

    Dec 13, 18 03:29 PM

    This year I’m not even putting up a tree. It’s just me and mom and she doesn’t know, nor will remember if told, that Christmas is happening. The day of,

    Read More