Caregiver pressure

by Larry

My wife and myself end up on call 24/7. I do have a sister who may or may not help. A couple of others who give a little time if they have nothing else to do.

We have a home and goats on farm which need a lot of care. We have neglected them for him. Our property looks terrible. We have been doing some remodeling of our home. That has been halted until I can be there.

Our health seems to be depleted due to sitting around and sleeping on sofas while watching him.

He has always been active until breaking a hip a few months ago. Now everything is about him.Normally he wouldn't expect you to sacrifice for him, Mother died a few months ago which has set him back.

He fell about 6 months ago and broke hip. Went to rehab but not much help for a 94 yr old. people around us are going here and there for vacations. we have not had a vacation in 10-11yrs. Burned out.

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Burned Out
by: Sadie

So sorry to hear of your struggles right now. I agree that dogs (and other pets) are incredibly therapeutic but they would also be another demand on you so maybe now is not the right time for that?

Just a thought... In the UK, those in need of care can go into respite, this can be for as long as required; the funding is means tested though. Do you have anything like that in the states?

Or any carers groups or support services where volunteers can come in to give you a break? Try not to worry about the house so much, some things just have to give, it is more important that you can find ways to attend to your own needs, even if that is just for a small amount of time every day.

If there are other relatives or friends who could step in and give you some time off I would be honest with them about how much you are struggling.

Could you maybe find some help for the goats? That would be very rewarding for someone to do on a voluntary basis, my kids (excuse the pun) would absolutely love it!

Sometimes it just helps to know that others are feeling the same and that you are not alone. Take care.

by: steve

Do you have a dog? They are the best therapy! If you do not have one of your own may I suggest you go to your local shelter and look for one? If you decide on one, try to get one a little bit older. You probably do not a puppy.

They are full of energy and need lots of attention. You probably also do not want one that is too old and will require extra care.

But if you find a middle aged dog, with enough love to give you without requiring a lot of special need he/she will be your best friend and will ease a lot of what you might think is abandonment from your family, plus they love to sleep with you on the couch and play ball out in the yard and go for walks.

Rescuing one from a shelter will save a life and bring life into yours, there's nothing quite like waking up to your best friend every morning!

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