Caregiver of an Abusive Mother

by Angela
(Saint Thomas)

Mom was abusive as I grew up. I didn’t know the depths until too many puzzle pieces added us. She was well aware they my dad molested my son. However, her driving was a threat to innocent people. I saw her confusion and stepped up to bat 8 years ago. Meantime I am a breast cancer survivor that had a baby at 46. Mom was and has always been demanding. Also add manipulative into the mixture and you can see life has been a living nightmare.

I got lympedema from overusing arm after lymph node surgery because I had to move her in with us.
Thanks to her teaching me a lesson of refusing to take her shopping she ordered a bed that was used and had bed bugs. I had to pack up my pump and throw out the sleeves.

She finally reached a point of feeling I was trying to poison her and she was going to leave. She also threatened me physically and told my five year old her niece that is 7 was going to turn out to spread her legs and sleep with everyone. There was an incident where she hit my five year old.

I had major surgery in July and the preadmission testing is the only reason I am here. Because I overuse the lymph arm it fills with fluid. It got out of hand as I packed the pump away and had to throw out my sleeves.

The doctor contacted me in a panic because
apparently I lost too much fluid and I also lost potassium. Had I not had blood work that day I would have dropped dead.March I was ER with critical respiratory care because I couldn’t get to doctors to shake my asthma and bronchitis.

So I have this surgery and she really threatens to hit me and screams at the children I had her committed and they 302 my mother. I told them I cannot physically take care of her and refuse to bring her home.

However I did call and check on her and my daughter visited her. They couldn’t find anywhere to go because she liquidated everything and have to even neighbors and then proceeded to laugh and say she could be as mean as she wanted to because no nursing home home would take her as she liquidated her assets.

I just got a letter accusing me of abandoning my mother with no long to care in place. I had 30 days to respond or be placed on an abuse registry.

The letter was dated August 31 but postmarked October 16. I supplement my disability with foster care and now I will lose that over being placed on abuse registry. Should I be penalized because she is killing me physically. I have major documented health issues. They are serious.

They are so concerned at what was liquidated yet I provided 8 years of care by this abused. Yet they pay people to take care of their parents with no assets.
I need help!

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