I have recently begun the treadmill of being my mother's primary caregiver, while dealing with my own health issues.
My mother, who is 79 and lives alone, has multiple sclerosis and recently fell and broke her shoulder. Her MS has always been mild, however when she tries to do too much she becomes fatigued as in this case of her last fall.
She is also neglecting her self-care, becoming dehydrated and not taking medications as directed. After the falling incident, I tried to provide 24 hour care, (mom is also incontinent) but it became too much for me physically as I have lupus and severe osteoarthritis.
Mom was admitted to a Rehab Facility for rest and strengthening of her legs as well as using the uninjured arm. Her reluctance to participate in PT was very discouraging until she realized that in order to provide self-care and return home, she must regain her strength.
Because she was so miserable there, and begged me to get her out of the rehab facility, I had her transferred to an assisted living facility close to home. Now she is pulling the "I'm not hungry card". Hates the food, doesn't want to socialize with other residents.
She says she is worried about me and my health, however her behavior is quite contrary. She will return to living in her home, however this time I will have a home health assistance 3 days a week.
I know I'm doing all that is necessary to ensure that mom will get the best care available, and continue to enjoy her own home. However, I am feeling so exhausted, depressed and conflicted.
Mom and I have a difficult relationship and I recognize that will play a huge role in how I deal with this. I feel so bad to admit, I love her but sometimes don't like her. I wish I could change that.